Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Sleepover part deux

Okay, I realise that I haven’t provided any kind of update on the night of the sleepover. It’s scandalous, and I’m ashamed of myself for taking so long to write today’s post. Work, two children, a cat and two amazing games of football on the television are hardly an excuse, I realise that. So… let’s see…

I cooked a pretty fab dinner if I say so myself… roast lamb, potatoes, cauliflower cheese, a green salad, and apple pie with extra thick cream for dessert (make’s me wonder why the fuck I’m single, actually!). We got through a couple of bottles of wine in rapid succession, and opened a third as we sat down in the lounge, slightly the worse for wear but pretty chilled and enjoying catching up. (I would have rolled a spliff at this point, if the rat bags who burgled my house hadn’t gone off with my hand carved antique wooden stash box that I bought in Prague!) Anyway, at some point she wandered into the kitchen for a glass of water, and came back holding a box containing a very strange battery operated shoe polisher that someone bought me in an “Everything for a Pound” shop in Brighton. “What on earth’s this”, she asked as she walked back into the room. I gave her the obvious answer (!) to which she replied “Have you ever tried… you know. Using it on something other than shoes?” (I know… where do I find them?)

To cut a long story short, we spent the next half an hour testing the different brushes on various parts of each other’s anatomy. Of course, we started on the wrists, the back of the neck, even the soles of the feet (the fluffy brushes were particularly nice) and then - gradually - got a bit more daring. Now, bearing in mind that we were more than a little inebriated, it would have taken an iron will, an incredible sense of responsibility, and a man who knows he’s got a hot date on Saturday to eventually lead her up the stairs and deposit her, as planned, in O’s room for the night. And to stay in his own bed, depsite the fact that just a couple of yards separated two hot, pulsing and rather polished bodies. But I’m happy to say, that’s precisely what I did. I even ran her a bath in the morning and refrained from getting in with her. Sometimes, I surprise myself… not often, but sometimes.

Now, tell me honestly… are you disappointed?

26 comments:

Mine Is a Gin said...

Goodness, wdky! And so many people are relying on you for some vicarious pleasure! ;-)

kimberly said...

i don't know wdky, but it sounds like she would have been a willing participant for whatever else you had in mind! after all, the shoe polisher was her idea. you do have an iron will... and a good way of telling a story. i was glued to every word.

yoursecret said...

Impressed, in a strange sort of way, actually.

wdky said...

Ginny, it's a heavy burden to bear, you know...

Kim - that's kind, thank you! Yes, she was quite into the polishing of body parts. She was gleaming by the time I was finished with her :-)

Yoursecret - I'm pleased. I value your opinions, and if you're impressed it can only be a good thing.

annalis said...

Wow. I'm not disappointed more shocked than anything. *grins*

darkneuro said...

OK, so you can cook, you drive a nice car, you have ambition, you're (from all reports and some body part pictures) nice looking, you have kickass taste in music (yes, i've been looking) you have kids that are cute as anything...

Why the fuck ARE you single?

kimmyk said...

such the english gentleman aren'tcha? you know what that will do to her now don'tcha? she'll get this wacky notion you respect her and that will only make her want you even more...you've become an enigma to her. (AND her friends) "Why on earth wouldnt he have sex with me?" To which her friends will either reply.."He's either too good to be true or he's gay!"

Keep 'em guessin' WDKY.

hamrose said...

A man who cooks, has a sense of decency, likes a toke on occasion, and has that really cute car named...whatever it is....of course you'd have to be way over there across the ocean wouldn't you.

P.S. I am a little surprised at the great show of restraint. I'm not so sure I would have, if I were a man...(If that makes any sense).

anu said...

Now you are so tempting :)

emerald eyes said...

Hmmmmm... for some reason I don't believe a word you say.... I think I need to consult with the cat to find the real truth here...

BUT, since I adore you, I'm gonna have to believe you... :)

lee ann said...

Oh sounds wonderful. The dinner...wow!

Caterpillar said...

I'm amazed at your restraint!! Seriously! After over a bottle of wine and a skin-polishing session, I don't know how you did it!

And I love that you can really, really cook!

heather said...

nope,...

now i just think you may very well be showing your age.

;)

blueprincesa said...

Nope;-)

mez said...

nah, not at all..
..a bit of a crush now actually :P

paula said...

yeah actually i am!!! but it's nice to know u're such a good cook... i would love to try ur apple pie...mmmmmmmmmm

J's Girlfriend said...

That'll teach you to immediately give all ridiculous unwanted presents to a charity shop.

If you had, there wouldn't have been any machine to do the job of stroking the sleepover, and you'd have had to do it.

And most likely got laid at some point in the process.

Or am I missing something here?

networkchic said...

Not disappointed...jealous. :-)

Miss gL said...

i am not disappointed, i am intrigued in my pretend to be a therapist way.do you know why you chose this night and/or this woman to show restraint? How rare is that type of choice for you? you are single, so why the sense of responsibility and "iron will"? i wonder whether it wasn't about increasing the tension for something in the future, or sending a signal about where you stand in your head re: being with her,no matter what the chemistry was saying.
i hope that wasn't too cheeky. btw, thanks for your comment on my post. i actually was hoping you would opine and it really comforted me that you supported my stance.

sirreene said...

I'm not sure I'd want to be with someone who had been worked up by a "shoe" polisher. I would think both of you did the better thing by sleeping off the "glows".

k o w said...

Good shit. More semen saved for Saturday.

anu said...

I am in splits reading 'K o w' s comment. LOL

unforgiving b*tch said...

If you showed that much restraint...then that means this hot date on Saturday must really mean something...

Or you were just trying to prove to yourself that you could do it....

eljacek said...

oh man, I love my digital rebel, sure its the olde 6.3 megapix, but whatever, it still rocks. :) and hey ... have fun with it, you'll start taking so many more pictures now that youve got one :)

NML said...

I am howling with laughter. You two are beyond funny. I mean, where do you find a woman that wants you to use a shoe polisher on her? Jaysus!

check said...

Iron will for sure T! and LOL at kow!