Fuck karma

Do you believe in karma? I don’t think I do, but sometimes things... happen, and there seems to be too much design behind them for them to be accidental, or random. Anyway, let me tell you about yesterday, which was really a very, very bad day...

It started in a less than positive vein, when my bank confirmed that not a single client had settled the invoices I sent out in April. Now, April was the first month that I billed anyone, and my terms are thirty days... basically, then, it’s June and I’ve had no income this year. Great!

Next, my laptop picked up a Trojan Horse that took me about three hours to clear. It was a bad one, too... had to scan about three times, once in safe mode, and clean the hard drive using three different applications. And then edit the registry. And then scan again (getting the picture?). Yes, a productive use of my time, for sure.

But, I have to say, the piece de resistance came later in the day, and for this one I have to backtrack a little. To Sunday night, in fact, when Dina and I decided that we needed to get together to explore what had happened to us when we first met. And explore we did, not in a sexual sense (other than within the confines of our imaginations, anyway) but enough to know that this was something… real. In fact, we both left each other on Sunday night thinking that – if indeed we had been searching for something – then that search was over.

Yesterday afternoon, then, she sent me an email, an email that gave me a little more information about her. Information of a very personal nature. And the consequence of her sharing that with me is that I can never see her again, even though I know she was a woman who I would have loved. Life sucks sometimes, doesn’t it?

As an aside…

I thought I had problems with Audioblog yesterday, hence the (initial) use of Castpost. But it seems that it’s actually Blogger, in that it won’t let me edit any posts that contain a music file – I can only see them in “preview” mode. Is it just me?

But problems aside, yesterday’s Musical Monday was wonderful, and thanks to CeeCi and Mez I’ve got some new music on the way from Amazon that I know I’m going to love. Oh, and I also bought this and this. Sometimes, I just thank god for music.