Sunday, January 01, 2006

Plus ca change

I don’t know about you, but I can’t say I feel very different. It’s… well, it’s Sunday. I’ve just watched a movie (and, I admit, cried at the end, but only for a minute) and now I’m posting on my blog. A pretty seamless transition into 2006, all in all.

Last night I went over to Cute Lawyer for dinner and to see the New Year in. I met her two beautiful daughters, but only as a “friend” of their Mum… I was completely captivated by them, though, especially the younger one, who’s seven, and who kind of took to me as soon as I walked through the door. We ended up doing handstands for some reason, and had a great meal, lots of wine, and then some champagne as the clock struck midnight.

If I were to be entirely honest I’d have to say that I’m not entirely convinced that she’s the woman for me. Not that there’s anything tangible wrong more that I just don’t feel… hmmm. Something. That thing that makes us tingle when we first meet someone. And – at the same time – I’ve come to realise that I let someone go a while back who I should have realised was very, very special. Remember the post about an amazing girl I called “C”? I can’t seem to get her out of my mind, and she’s made a point of keeping in touch over the last few months, including a really sweet Christmas card on top of the emails and texts. I don’t know for sure what this will mean in terms of consequences, but I’m going to give it some thought and then do whatever my heart, as opposed to my head, tells me is right.

At the same time, GG has started another psycho email offensive. She alternates between telling me what a disappointment I’ve proven to be and then implying that I’m her soulmate, the love of her life. And apparently I feel the same weay, but I’m too frightened to admit it. This one, the fourth tonight, hit my inbox as I was staring to type this post…
“An hour of silence… or a night of gorgeous sex…before you taste another woman… I still have your taste in my mouth…do you have mine in yours?

I’d love to lavish your cock again once more. I know all the skin, all the wrinkles… and see your beautiful house one last time… I feel you are my true love….my only one in this earth, past or future…

I am so truly sad... Do you believe in fate?”
Sorry if that was a bit explicit, but it's what I have to read when I check my mail. I mean, for fuck sake, give me a break! I think it would have been advantageous not to have behaved like a complete lunatic from hell, GG, in retrospect. N’est pas?

I hope you all had a great time over the New Year, anyway... I have a strong feeling that 2006 is going to be an important year, for some reason. Lot's of us seem to have reached some kind of watershed in our lives, and it'll be interesting to look back this time next year... I wonder what we'll be feeling. I hope we're all in a good place, though.


emerald eyes said...

I hope we're all in a good place, too, sweets.
See ya same time, same place, next year, I hope.

Caterpillar said...

I echo Emerald, and hope we're all in a good place a year from now.

And I can't believe GG is back at it. But with regard to CL or C or anyone else, I don't worry about you - I think you, more than most people, know how to listen to your heart!

Happy New Year, sexy! xx

paula said...

happy new year for u too. u know what they say..."new year same old shit" nothing changed, same problems, same fears, same place...sometimes when i start a new year in a way i renew my hope this one is gonna be good but i don't feel like that this year...maybe im getting anyway...kisses and the best for u....for real

Blondie said...

I do hope for a good year and definitely hope to see you still blogging on. Emerald said it quite well.

About GG...bleh, I'd want to just dump a bucket of water on her and yell to wake up. She really needs to get over herself it seems. Or something. I'd watch my out my window for the telephoto night vision goggles. ;-)

About the other gal or one that struck your heart... You know how your heart feels and how your mind reacts. I am a person that is always a sucker for first impressions and there are a few people that I still kick myself over.

Here's to a wonderful year T!


kel said...

Happy New Year! I have a feeling it's going to be a good one! I haven't puked yet... that's always a good sign! It's always a good way to start a new year when one isn't hanging with their head in the toilet, ya think?!? Cheers!

FireCracker said...

I've been lurking in the shadows for the last few months and I promised myself that I would step into the light this year. Enjoy 2006 and make it one you'll always remember. Happy New Year!

Sher said...

One of the best quotes from a movie was "Never let anything become a regret, it's worse than being a loser". You'll never know about "C" unless you give it a go right?

I actually was wondering if "GG" had rode off into the sunset, but I guess not. Wacky is too nice of a word for her.

It's been raining here all weekend. The tree is gone and the little one in bed. I really need some ice cream.

Happy New Year babe!

j said...

the first day of the new year is quite anti climatic; just another day really.
i hope this is a big year for you and i look forward to reading about your's.

and gg? yikes!! never let me be that nuts!!

zoozan said...

seriously unhinged, poor woman. Don't take what she says seriously.

I agree - it's going to be a watershed year for a few of us. I'm feeling hopeful.

wdky said...

Em, I hope so too.

Thanks Cat, and to you too!

Paula, for real? You're just teasing me now :-)

Ruthie, the night vision goggles thing has worried me slightly! What a thought :-0

Kel, you're right. It's a good sign.

Firecracker, welcome, and please comment as often as you'd like too. I appreciate you saying hello, and HNY to you too.

Wacky IS too nice, Sher. I might just have her whacked, though (I was always a Goodfellas fan). Now I want ice cream too.

J - yikes indeed. Crackpot. A new year and a new blog for you... I'm looking forward to reading more...

Zooz, next time will you listen to me???

J's Gf said...

Good morning!

Regular day; well at least you didn't have to work before 0600 in the new year...

I think it does feel like a new start, but maybe that's just because I'm young and naive.

I haven't had any chocolate all day although there's tons in the office. Surely a good start.

wdky said...

Hey, I'm not THAT old! But I thought it was a Bank Holiday today...ooops!

J's Gf said...

Oh, and your ex is clearly completely sociopathic. How about a new rule in outlook.. the 'blocking' kind?

And also thanks for kind praise of my writing. One day I'll get paid for it, I swear!

wdky said...

Damn... my response hasn't appeared. I said something about me not being THAT old (watch it) and also that I thought it was a Bank Holiday today. As for GG, I've had two more emails since I got up this morning... I use Mozilla Firefox for non-work email though, and I don't know if I can block her on that.

Your writing is beautiful. I'll pay you if no-one else will.

New York Moments said...

Happy New Year! 2006 is going to be a great year. After all, it just HAS to be better than 2005.

More GG drama? At least it's fun blog material :-)

kimmyk said...

Oh my word @ GG! Yeah what NYM said-she's great blogging material. But sheesh!

I think 2006 is going to be a good year for you-new beginnings, new women!

wdky said...

thanks, and she's a nut-job NYM. But I have news.

Kimmy, ditto. And thank you!

trouble said...

Sounds like you've encountered one of the multitude of "scary/sad" girls out there in singledom. Sorry. I hear they're great in the sack but make you crazy everywhere else.

The only way to get rid of them is to never respond again.

Hope your year is great, wdky.

check said...

Happy new year T! Hope it brings you lots of luck, love and other nice stuff..
GG... what can I say?!

Blondie said...

Good GOD, she has emailed you more??? I don't think I've been that crazy about anyone. :-( I'm sorry you're having to deal with this babe.

Mine Is a Gin said...

Sorry to hear GG is still misbehaving. Hopefully she'll give up soon, though my VS hasn't yet - had an IM from him the other day telling me I shouldn't make it obvious that I'm not at home (I hope it wasn't supposed to be a veiled threat!)

And as to the CL/C dilemma, I think heart rather than head is the one to listen to (if anyone could ever trust my judgement on that!)

Anyway, good luck & happy new year x

ladylongfellow said...

Well, I'm glad you had a nice New Year and enjoyed yourself! 2006 will be a bigger and better year for you, I'm sure! I hope that for all of bloggers!

I must tell you that whole email from GG is just disturbing. Sure, it's fun blog material, but you have that one crazy nutjob that makes women as a whole look bad! Kind of like Fatal attraction, UK style minus the rabbit. Don't respond to her anymore! Maybe your fellow bloggers should start emailing her and texting her to drive her mad? You could always post it in your blog...NOW that would create some blog it's a tad mean, I suppose. OH well, it was worth a thought!

NML said...

You know, email is a form of communication that really gets abused. I don't mean spamming, which is shit, but I mean that offensive behaviour of sending diatribe for you to read like that. One minute putting you down, the next doing the soul mate thing. I think it's awful. Why harrass someone? Can't the mofo take a hint! I appreciate that we can just skip on but when someone you know is sending you emails, you feel compelled to look. Block her and tune her out. She needs to get a grip. Ooh, it's a while since I've had a rant!

wdky said...

I know, it's a damn cheek. Lovely rant, by the way.