Tuesday, November 22, 2005

Bollocks to this

Right, just before I post for the day, a quick glimpse at some of the Google searches that have landed people at my doorstep. As always, if I wasn’t doubting my own sanity before, I certainly am now.

• how to become an emotionally stronger person
• husband doesn't notice me
• help my daughter was in an abusive relationship and it won't go away
• how do i kill myself the easiest way
• great arse
• on the tube had sex
• doesn't like dick
• in 1960 what happened to kill the clean water
• tenerife sex
• barcelona sex photos
• kill you
• apologise for being rude spiritual
• contemplate the unimaginable vastness of the universe
• don't date this person

And, without doubt my favourite…

• sher see my cock (something you want to tell us, Sher?)

So, where was I? Oh yes, GG… well, it’s the strangest thing. Those of you who were reading my early posts about GG will know that – almost from day one – things were far from perfect. The main issues arose as a consequence of her approach to sex, and whilst it provided me with an opportunity to demonstrate staying power of legendary proportions the fact remains that it would probably be accurate to say that we weren’t 100% compatible in a sexual sense.

Now, none of this had “gone away”, even though the sex itself had become more… I don’t know, manageable. (And, to be fair, I’d stopped posting quite as much about it, which I guess must mean that it had be come less of an issue.) But I will admit that, when GG sprung her surprise on me the other day, part of me felt almost relief that it had happened. No, I wouldn’t have chosen to end things myself, but having had the situation forced on me I decided to try to think positively about it. And – frankly – another part of me kind of wanted to be single again. I won’t expand on that right now, but maybe I will another time.

So, at the same time that I was becoming completely comfortable with the notion that I was on my own again, GG seemed to go through some kind of psychotic episode. For the last few days, and despite pleas for it to stop. I’ve received on average the following (remember, this is an average - some days were worse than others!):

• 7 emails
• 3 messages on home telephone answering service
• 8 text messages

Now, I have to tell you that this constant, unrelenting emotional assault is having a very singular effect, and I doubt that I need to explain to you what that is. And – if that wasn’t bad enough –one of the emails I received today was two and a half pages long, and was a copy of an email she had received from her last boyfriend. Actually received today, I might add… as if I want to read the bloody thing. I quote, just to give you a flavour… “I felt things with you I have never felt before and doubt I will ever feel again… My heart breaks when I think of your wisdom and courage in the face of my madness. I am humbled by the memory of you… My heart is undiminished, I still love you…”

Okay… now, I had been asking for just a little leeway whilst I get through a really busy week, and was going to suggest that we get together for a drink and a talk some time over the course of next week. But you know what? Fuck that! I’ve got no room in my life – particularly now – for someone so emotionally unbalanced that she clearly has no idea whatsoever how unacceptable and frankly bizarre her behaviour has become.

Now, I really don’t mean to sound harsh, but consider this… I have two young children to look after and nurture; I have no regular income as of 1st January next year; and I have a new business that I have to build, failing which who I may or may not be going out with will be the least of my problems. Oh, and I forgot - she finished with me!!

So, I think it's fair to assume that it's over. Now… where did I put that ice bucket?

26 comments:

Blondie said...

Wow...
I cringed a bit because I have to say I've been guilty of being pushy to find out why a lack of communication has occurred... But only at a friend or significant other that just I didn't hear a peep from...not after a breakup.

BUT

When I broke stuff off...that was it. I'm a person that can cut the ties a little too easy.

Like I said, Wow...

You have a lot on your plate right now WDKY. I think just fading out to focus on your current needs is a bit more important. *blushing* If it were me, I'd just stop responding. I've done it before...and I can probably say it will happen again. I know I sound harsh.

I promise I'm a tender person, but when I'm done, I'm done. She made her point and needs to own up to the fact that she made a decision. Love isn't something you can just retract and reinstate at your own convienence.

Sorry for the tangent.
xx
R

K.D. Morgan said...

Trust your instincts and focus on what you need to do to make your life all it can be.

(And speaking of emotionally unbalanced - here I thought we were getting hitched) *laughs*

honkeie2 said...

Wow, now just think if you knew this about this person in the begining would you even spoken to this person?

Networkchic said...

Amen.

NewYorkMoments said...

Yikes! My favorite part of this is that she IS the one who ended it. Very amusing. (Ummm...in a sick & twisted sense...)

Caterpillar said...

I'm glad you found out and that it makes it that much easier on you now!!!

And I love reading how people get to our blogs - some of them I can't understand!

NML said...

Wow what a complete overload. It's all a bit...much. I don't blame you for feeling how you do and you are right to follow your gut. GG needs to get a grip.

E-E said...

Sigh. I agree with k.d.... Trust your instincts and focus on what you need to do.

She's overboard, no question.
Dating is tough, esp. dating a man with kids... SO, THEREFORE one must respect that little tidbit!
Sheeeesh.

If she were stable and not so needy she would realize all this and give you the space you need.
Ehh, who am I kidding?
;)

ladylongfellow said...

Well, patience isn't one of her virtues...lol...we see. I don't know what to tell ya....but you need to go chill out...and blow off some steam. Call some friends this weekend and go have fun! Or, I'm having a bedroom remodelling party this weekend if you want to come! lol

Sher said...

Uh...excuse me...but it was you asking me to see it.

"Sher see my cock"? is more question than statement. So don't try to push that one off on me.

Ummm...but now that you've brought it up...(eyes wide and blinking)

Sher said...

Oh and as for the GG drama, this my dear is what we call a "red flag". Be glad you found out now. And whatever you do...don't ignore it!

Chin up always!

WDKY said...

Ruthie, I tend to react in a similar way, actually.

KD - you mean we're not??

Honkie, possibly not!

NWC - precisely.

NYM, very sick and twisted!

Cat, it's weird, isn't it?

NML - I see you're with me on this. It's madness.

EE, thanks for understanding :-)

LL, I;m chilled. And if you were just a little closer...

Sher, the flag is a very brfight red. As for the other business... ;-)

nukie310 said...

So what you're saying is that her "Lets get back together" tactics aren't her strong point?

k o w said...

Right on brother. Screw her.

Sky said...

My first comment is about the barcelona sex photos. What scares me about this is isn't this where they do the Running of the Bulls?

WDKY, I give you a lot of credit for sticking to your instincts. I should try that some day :)

sirreene said...

I told you NO phone number! Don't let them know where you live, or your name. Next time you will heed my advise.

Blueprincesa said...

Wow... some women just don't know when to quit. There's no more surefire way to send a guy running than what she's doing.

Women are always talking about how dumb men can be sometimes, but gosh. We're dumb sometimes too.

positronic said...

Your decision seems to be the right one. And I don't think even someone without kids and a taking off business would have considered replying to any of GGs communiques. Don't get me wrong, I do think she sounds like a very intelligent and loving person, but her messages smell like the doings of regret and indecision. She has chosen to seperate and she hadn't prepared herself for the pain she would have caused herself. I call this triage in my somewhat limited talent for analogies. If a limb isn't working right, you take three long breaths and cut it off despite the pain it causes you. When its gone, you miss it for a while but you know in the long run you're better off without it. Harsh analog, I know, but that's what it feels like when you have to break up despite all the good times.

Surviving Online Dating said...

Dare I say a lot of the female posters here are happy about the break up and the 'potential availability' of WDKY? Sorry, it had to be said...

Anyhow,WDKY, you have always been dead honest with me-so I will be with you:

-I never thought GG was long term potential for you-she seemed 'nice' but in my eyes, I felt she was 'too out there'. I think you require more substance in your woman/women.

- A nice person doesn't always translate into sane. Her emails make her sound like a potential for a restraining order. Good you keep the kids away.

- If you decide to ever shag her again-you will not be able to be rid of her. She now knows you are capable of moving on and not respond to her.

Keep on moving on.

Jaimie said...

The searches were quite interesting. I would have to read your past posts to understand why your blog would come up under such things.
About GG-life sounds hectic enough. I think you made a wise choice, ESPECIALLY IF THE SEX LEAVES MUCH TO BE DESIRED.

fjl said...

Hi WDKY, how are ya. Sorry you got bombarded by GG. But I don't think you should worry, or call her a nutter. If she wasn't a nutter before, she isn't now, probably. You can pretty much ignore it, she's just having an end of relationship crisis. They happen. She's kind of washing you out of her hair, in a way. Saying everything she might never get the chance to. Like Blondie said, we're all guilty of this panick related silliness at rare times. Borne from lonely insecure moments. I don't think it reduces us all as people. Yes, it's completely daft, but she's no psycho. If she were going to weild a knife she'd have done it by now. Suddenly splitting up is a big break, it kind of makes us feel orphaned for abit. But she should understand you can't be dumped on in your position and it might be best to spell this out to her. She definitley isn't being fair to you. I'm sorry this is happening to you. Big hug.

WDKY said...

Nukie... errr, yes. I think that might be what I'm saying :-)

Or not, KOW!

Sky, it's easy. Try it, you'll see...

Sirreene - you're very wise. I'm sorry.

Blue, we can all be pillocks at times, regardless of gender. Sad, but true.

Pos, I thought you put that rather well. Good stuff!

C - really?? And thank you for being honest. I'm keeping on keeping on.

Jaimie - precisely!!

FJL... yes, what you say is absolutely true. I was reacting when I posted, but your measured comments are right on the button.

Blondie said...

I hope your day/evening has been better than yesterday.

Speaking of hyper needy exes... Mine is about to drive me up the effen wall! ;-)

xx

catt said...

Hello! I'm still around; I should have told you that Unstable Diagnosis wasn't any more :( My blog at http://scrawler.wplite.com will be the place where dark stuff will be just in a different way ;)

kimmyk said...

Oy!

• 7 emails---red flag
• 3 messages on home telephone answering service---RED flag!
• 8 text messages---RED FUCKING FLAG!

And to send an ex's email too? Sheesh.
Have you responded to any? I wouldn't.
Seems she is sounding a bit unstable.....

Take care of yourself and your children.
She's freakin me out and I don't even know her.

WDKY said...

I will, Kimmy, and no - I haven't responded!