Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Breakfast, Dubya and GG.

Right. I feel the need to get something off my chest, and it concerns my breakfast cereal, Alpen (original, as opposed to no added sugar, if you were wondering). For the third box running, I'm finding that the proportion of raisins to other ingredients is simply far too high… yesterday, I had to manually remove 42 – yes, I said 42 – raisins from my cereal bowl before adding milk. It's beginning to really f*ck me off, so if anyone from Weetabix is reading this, will you please do something about it. Now. Because if you don't, I’m switching to Harvest Crunch with Real Strawberries without further notice. And that's not made by Weetabix!

Oh yes, I wanted to congratulate Claire (she’s very nice, and very talented) on her outstanding discovery of Dubya’s Hotmail Inbox which kind of explains why he took so long getting his Presidential Arse down to the Katrina disaster area. I mean, he seems to have a lot on his plate. (And yes, I know. The link does something weird if you leave it for too long.)

Okay, so getting back to the subject of GG... she's been over in Genoa for her friend's wedding (the one that I didn’t go to) but we’ve been texting every day. I have a bit of a confession to make actually, because as I was driving round the motorway this morning I came over a bit... well... errr, 'wussy'. And I called her. And it gets worse, because when we'd spoken I had a feeling that was almost like (I can't believe I'm saying this) relief. I’ve been missing her.

Now, I've been thinking about this whole business with C. On the upside, sex is unf*ckingbelievable; she's astonishingly beautiful; she has a body that needs to be seen to be believed; and I really, really like her. But on the downside, she's a bit... intangible (I know, but I don't have another way to say it); she's always off somewhere or other reporting on dance or extreme sports; and there's a kind of lack of synchronicity about our lives.

Before I wrote this post GG sent me a text, saying she was going to bed, and that she missed me. She also said something rather sweet in Spanish, and I decided that I was NOT going to screw this up. There and then. Maybe it'll turn out to be something important, maybe it won't. But for once my decisions are going to be made by an organ above my belt.

I think I can carry it off.

Early morning edit: God, I so need sex!

25 comments:

NewYorkMoments said...

Why are you counting raisins?

LDR said...

Manual removal and inventory of raisins. Hmm. Sounds like a great resume builder!

You know, hot bodies eventually get old and need plastic surgery. Substance is something that has lasting power... GG seems to have that.. and she seems interested... so what's the problem again?

Anonymous said...

switch to porridge

WDKY said...

Look, the cereal thing was just a passing comment. This is my life we're talking about here...

Thanks for stopping by, a.e.c. and k, and yes - hot bodies do get old. I suspect C's is one that won't need any surgery, though. Does GG have substance? Yes, I think she does. Have I well outgrown my unable-to-think-other-than-with-my-dick phase? Too f*cking right I have.

Anonymous said...

I agree. GG is the one for you. With C its just about sex and image and lets face it, you can open up a magazine for that. GG can offer you more, you'd be a fool to ignore that!

WDKY said...

I'm a lot of things but I'm not a fool, Claire. I think you could be right.

mango said...

Too many raisins? Are you mad?

There can never be too many raisins in Alpen! In any cereal! I add raisins to cereal, even cereal with raisins already in it.

'Too many' just doesn't come into it - 42 raisins in one bowl? Not enough, that's what that is.

WDKY said...

42 was just the number I took out of the bowl...

Anonymous said...

YOU NEED SEX!!!!!!


Bloody hell, how do you think I feel? I think I've healed over.

WDKY said...

ROFLMAO

Anyway, it looks like you're sorted.

Anonymous said...

many a slip twitx the date and the dip

k o w said...

Raisins are good for you. And so is GG it seems. Good luck thinking with the other organ. I'll never figure out how to do it myself.

WDKY said...

Thanks. It's not easy, but remember I'm older than you :-)

Caterpillar said...

The raisin discussion cracked me up!! I love those kind of passing comments in between discussions on life! And btw, I completely agree with you. But I couldn't stop laughing that you counted them!

And I'm with everyone else, GG sounds better.

WDKY said...

It's important to get these things off your chest.

And thanks - she does, doesn't she>

Networkchic said...

Decisions made with the noggin above your belt? Good luck! Ha just kidding...I'm glad you decided to give it a go.

Networkchic said...

Oh, and about the cereal...raisins are good for you.

WDKY said...

I'll turn into a bloody raisin at this rate...

Anonymous said...

raisins to be cheerful - part one

... j said...

WDKY as long as it's not the brain (you know cerebrum, cerebellum, medulla - all that good jazz) at least speaking from personal experience, every time i think about anything in a relationship with a person that I like it then goes into this cataclysmic downward spiral and ends in this utterly shitty way. - just warning you, best not to think at all and just go with it.

as for breakfast, I think you should switch to a bagel with tomato and cream cheese and distance yourself from cereal entirely.

WDKY said...

Fine advice, EJ. Not sure I could do bagels for breakfast, though.

NML/Natalie said...

This post had me cracking up laughing. The raisins, the hotmail account, the thinking with something above the waistband and then ending the post with saying that you need sex. Classic!

WDKY said...

I regard that as praise indeed, NML :-)

... j said...

Ok ok, so screw the bagels (though I will tell you they're damn good when they're fresh) ... how about... some of that grainy cereal, i think it's called grain nuts or something like that, not only is it damn good for you but it'll get those bowels moving like crazy (this is good as it makes your stomach flatter, not being backed up is great)

ok ... right... im gonna go back to my wierd blogosphere now.

WDKY said...

That's precisely why I have Alpen for breakfast, EJ. Although it may be just a little too much information...